nekare

Okay, so since I promised javajunkie13 that I would do this so she could go and write in Spanish in turn, I present you...

My first ever HP fanfic in English.

This SUCKS BIG TIME. I'd only begun to write for a couple of months, and I hadn't gotten the hang of writing in English as of yet, and OMG the stupidity makes my eyes bleed! I didn't change anything, so it's just like it's been in it's glorious grammatical butchery and idiotic plot. And yes, I was planning to make a series out of this. *pukes* I was on my James/Lily phase, and to make matters worse, my parents had kicked me out from the computer on their room (my laptop only existed in my imagination back then), so I had to write this in an antique posing as a laptop, black and white screen, windows 3.1, you know the deal. It also refused to write Is, and changed them as Y. Go figure.

Oh well, at least I know I have gotten better. Loads better, if this is any indication.

Musings of a bored mind


1. Lily


The evil eraser and Lily's not-diary

What is it with sand and bathing suits anyway? I mean, what is it that attracts sand so much to get beneath the bathing suit, as a moth to an electric bulb? (since there aren't any electric bulbs at Hogwarts, let's just call it flames.)

will we - mere mortals - ever get an answer to such a transcendental question?

my bets are on the 'no' side.

But returning to my point, why does sand has to be so bloody difficult to get out? I ask this because it took me nearly three hours to get the damn sand out.

And I really like that bathing suit! I've been told I look good on it. by a really cute american guy. Wait, erase that, by a really hot american guy.

So yeah, I pretty much adore said bathing suit (is it just me, or I've used that word an awful number of times?). and the hot looking american guy, but that's another story.

Still my mind flies to, to... what was his name again?

Whatever, let's call him Bob.

Bob? what kind of crapy name is that? anyway, Bob's blue eyes...Bob's smile... Bob's amazing legs... Bob's... NO!, focus Lily, focus.

What was I focusing in?

"Miss Potter?"

Oh, right, I was trying to focus in Binn's class.

Wait, did he just call me... Potter?

Apparently so, since the entire classroom is laughing their heads off.

I squeal in horror.

The actual Potter turns to me with a cocky smile - a smile that makes me want to throttle him - and says in an arrogant tone "why professor, I didn't know you were so good in divination"

Ok, so maybe a slower death sounds better.

Binns just lifts an eyebrow, obviously didn't getting the 'joke' - I prefer to call it stupidity. -

I glare at Potter and turn to Binns. Not even someone as annoying as him - I'd rather not saying his name, thank you very much - would make me be rude to a professor. I can't afford to let him be better than me.

"My name is Evans professor." I couldn't hide the rage in my voice, though. But he didn't seem to really care.

"Whatever it is, you do not sleep in my class. Detention"

I gasp. I wasn't even asleep! Just thinking of Bob's eyes and... FOCUS!!

And still, it isn't as everyone is up and oh so interested in this class! I can still hear Debra's snores from here! - and if Binns can't hear that, that just will reinforce my theory of his deafness, and that his disease continued with him in the afterlife due his poor likeness to changes.

I'm sorry to say this theory of mine has made me a bit of a joke among my friends. They say I look to deep into things. What's wrong about it?! And I like my theory. At least I do a bit of thinking in this class, not as, well... the rest of school.

And I'm the one with detention?! I scream in my head at the injustice, buy after all I am Head Girl, and I have a duty of being a good example for the rest of my classmates.

Now, that sucks, doesn't it?

"Yes, professor Binns."

"Finally accepting your destiny as future Mrs. Potter, Evans?" Potter says with an even cockier smile - if that's even possible.

Note to self: murder Potter in long painful way.

Second note to self: go to library and search for long, painful ways of dying. Look into forbidden section. Pretend is an essay - which is a torture itself - for potions.

I glare harder, and when Binns turns around to resume his boring lesson - the banning of Dragons in 1348 - I hex my eraser so it attacks Potter.

My mood lightens considerably when I hear a faint "ow!"

---------

It's been two hours and the eraser is still attacking Potter at regular intervals. I beam when I see him trying to run away from it, still trying to eat his pie. Unfortunately, he was busy dodging the eraser, and didn't see Peter eating it quickly. he may run but he can't escape my wrath!! - Insert evil laughter - .

I'm kinda liking being evil...

I cringe a little when the eraser hits him between the eyes and he falls off his chair. maybe he's had enough punishment? I may lift the spell - why the hell did my parents had to taught me so damn much to be nice and compasive? that only if he's a nice boy of course.

Maybe.

"I'll forgive you for the abuse if you go out with me, Evans. What'd you thing?" he says as he lifts himself of the ground.

Maybe not.

----------



Lily's Top Secret, uh... notebook?

(but most definitely, not a diary. - childhood trauma -)Binns Deafness: a theory by Lily Evans.

Reasons due:

1. he's afraid to changes.

Proof: he couldn't make the passing from alive and teaching, to death and not teaching.

2. he never pays attention to his students, of what they do. Also, he can't listen his own voice so he doesn't really know of the ability his voice has to induce sleep. (Note to self: get a magic recorder to tape his class, and use it in insomnia nights. God knows I need it.)

3. he can only read lips, and therefore, he doesn't hear (or read) other things that are said outside his view range.

Proof: he didn't give punishment to Potter for stupid commentary. - When he definitely should have.

Okay, now that I've finally written my theory down (I was starting to forget it) in my brand new, uh, notebook (but not a diary) I can keep on hating Potter. but Della has made me promise I would try this - she even said she's going to check I did it - and said it was going to help me get my ideas in order - like I need to get my ideas in order about that - , but I'm not really buying it. Anyway, here it goes:

Pros and Cons of James Potter:

- I so hate you Della -

Pros: uh...um... well, since I can't really find any at this time, I'll just go ahead to the cons.

Cons: now, of this I can think of.

1. He's an arrogant, self-centered prat.

2. He thinks he's superior to every one else. - Which he definitely isn't. -

3. He keeps messing his hair, like it looks cool of something. Wake up buddy, it doesn't! It just makes him look in great need for a haircut. (Something I would gladly do by myself, especially if he's asleep and unaware of said haircut.)

4. He likes to ask random girls out just for the fun of it. he dumps them two days after, or in the better case he lasts with them a whole week - I think his record is two weeks and a half... - ; and still he has an entire fan-club dying to go out with him. Where's the justice in that!! (Della says I hate that only for the fact that one must actually work hard to get a date. ha, like I would be envious of that, that... prat!)

5. He's way to good at transfigurations. He shouldn't be that good in such a horrible class! - Horrible for me, anyway -. I'm still trying to figure out how he does it, and so far my favorite theory - I'm fairly good at making theories - is that he is in a hot love affair with professor McGonagall, and she's been helping him while he goes to 'remedial transfiguration', if you know what I mean... that or he actually does homework, which is highly doubtful. So it must be the first one, as sick as it is.

6. He's a-


a long time later

I was deep involved in my 'James Potter's Cons List', when professor Binns entered his office, and screamed at me for being there at that hour.

He forgot my detention!

So he's not only deaf, but he's also amnesiac! That'll bring my theory to a whole new level.

So he yelled at me, and I tried to make him remember giving me a detention - I'm such an idiot! -, but he didn't remember at all, so he just gave me a new detention for breaking into his office at late hours. Ha, like I'll show up!

Della checked the list! I thought she had been bluffing! she said I'd have to do my list again, since it didn't have any pros written down - she glared at me when I said I hadn't found none (she believes in giving people opportunities, can't imagine why) - but I refused energically. I like my list! It's really realistic.

She kept making fun of me about my theory of Binns. I told her that when I become rich and famous for my theory she'll have to apologize publically for ever doubting me. She just shocked her head and muttered something that sounded awfully like 'nutter' I felt truly offended.

She also asked why I had named this a notebook and not a diary. She laughed her head off when I told her that Kevin Carleone - whom liked to honor his last name - had once stolen my diary and read it aloud in the classroom, in front of my twenty classmates and my three week crush; therefore traumatizing my young seven year old mind. I haven't kept a diary since then, so I say it again:

This isn't by any means a diary. Never was, and never will.

the last thing I need is a way for Potter to blackmail me. Or even worst, to broadcast it to the entire school.

And I really should worry for the worst, since that sounds awfully Potteresque.

Wow, I just made up a word!